THE RUSS INTERVIEW (posted 7/21/05, file05.01)
No part of this interview may be reproduced in any way. Any illegal reproduction will result in Sam picking Doug up and throwing him through the glass door only to be
eaten by the bugs waiting to get inside.
MNP: Wow, Rusty. You had a horrid last quarter. Most people would have just hung up the cards and quit. What makes you think you are a winner when everyone else laughs at you behind your back?
Answer: Well, I needed to let Greg win a little. Our game switched to NL HE a year ago. GMPP 7/04-9/04 Me; 9/04-11/04 Me; 12/04-205 Greg (Threw him a bone); 3/05- 5/05 Me. People are laughing behind my back because of my New Kids
On The Block Tshirt, not my poker skills.
MNP: Is it true that when you swing your hands for an all in gesture you are bluffing, or are you just trying to wave away all the damn bugs flying around in your basement?
Answer: Ahh, my "All in" motion. Often mocked. Started when I repeatedly bitch slapped Sammy with that hand. I also did it to Calcav...Carnecchia to summon him forward to get his ass kicked. "Eat shit!"
MNP: What would be your response if John asked you out on a date, and expected "a little more than friendship" on the first date?
Answer: John (a.k.a "Fuck Puppet") would not get any love from me. He has his wife for that. Meaning, she gets love from me.
MNP: You seem to enjoy mocking Greg S. when he wears his sunglasses to play on Monday nights - yet when you come to the game you are wearing your pink thong and Spiderman under-roo tops - what gives?
Answer: He does look badass in those, doesn't he? Listen- leave my thong out of this. I'm done talking
about it.
MNP: Often, when you come to play on Monday nights, you seem to want a big applause as you come to the table. If it wasn't your house we would not be putting up with that shit. What does the applause do for you when we are cheering and clapping for you? Is it making up for the fact that you have a small penis?
Answer: I've noticed it's the same "polite" applause that "Jerry's Kids" get when they get shoved in front of the camera. My small penis is made up for by my enormous balls.
MNP: Do you feel like you deserve any respect at the poker table? If so, why?
Answer: Me? Respect? How do you respect a guy who routinely lies to you as he takes your hard earned cash? Where did I put my thong...
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