THE JIMMY P INTERVIEW (posted 11/16/05, file05.02)
No part of this interview may be reproduced in any way. Any illegal reproduction will result in Christie bearing her
breasts for all to see while John masturbates on the poker table.
MNP: What does the term "ship it" mean to you, and how does it affect your daily life?
Answer: To me "Ship-IT!" has become not only an expression of surprise, discontent,
happiness, sadness, agreement, disagreement, confusion and love, but a mantra.
To properly understand and respect these words and their true meaning is a
coming of age process. God forbid a speaker should ever utter this sacred phrase
inappropriately. Amen.
MNP: I hear you have a baby on the way. Very interesting, and that can be a life
changing experience. Do you feel that your poker days are numbered, or do you
think your wife will want you to leave the house just to get out of her face
every night?
Answer: Family life and quality time together with a spouse are things to be held dear.
I have every intention of continuing proper 'family-man' duties. That being
said, time away from home as they say, "makes the heart grow fonder." With that
in mind (and the fact that my wife will absolutely kick my ass out of the house
if I'm home too many Mondays) - my poker days are not in jeopardy.
MNP: Ship it.
Answer: Bless you my son. Amen.
MNP: Lately, you seem to be distracted while playing cards. I see many
reasons for
this happening; a baby on the way, fishing addiction, the dildo we stuck
straight up in your poker chair. What do you feel is causing your distraction
to the game? And how do you plan to resolve this?
Answer: Dildo? Really? Wow - Rusty's right - I am loose....and I thought he was talking
about my stlye of play! I should have known better. With the fishing season over
and the baby very close to popping out, I plan on stepping up my play to a new
level. Beware.
MNP: It seems that you like to be in control of the betting and the direction of
how the game goes when you sit at the table. It always makes me giggle when
someone new comes and it boogers your game plan all up. What are the first
steps you take to control the new players, and how do you feel them out when
they sit down at the table?
Answer: I suppose I'm not too much different than most players. I watch and I watch and
I watch - Are they playing every hand (Chris C)?, are they playing every ace
(Christie L)? are they making crazy raises with shit (Rusty J)? are they playing
a tight-aggressive style (Greg S)? or are they folding 99% of hands (Misha)?
With new people at the table I like to bet when I should check and call when I
should raise. You can get a lot of information people when you're playing
improperly. After a few 'bad' hands against them, you can usually play the nuts
strong and get callers. You get paid - they go broke - and now you have the
power of fear behind your play.
MNP: While I was walking through the 7-11 the other day I noticed you hitting on
Amirsala, the dude at the counter. Was this because you were attracted to
him, or did you not bring enough cash for a Mega Millions ticket and you were
trying to "soften him up" a bit so he would give you one? And - if you won
the Mega Millions Lottery, what would you do with the money?
Answer: Part A - No Comment. Part B - Wow. The MegaMillions Jackpot - www.megamillions.com. Assuming a
crazy jackpot - like 100M or more after taxes, this would be my philosophy:
After taking care of my family properly - paying off relatives homes,
setting up trusts for my kids, making sure my immediate family, brother, mom and
dad have no needs, I would take care of my closest friends. Certainly with a
shit-ton of new cash to spend, it's no fun to be alone, so I guess that homes,
boats and $$ would be taken care of. Then comes me. Hmm. Silly house? Yep. Silly
cars? Yep. Awesome 22' silly Bass Boat? Yep. Then, properly invested, I would
have no worries.Ship it. Amen.
MNP: What feelings go through you mind when someone re-raises your raise?
Answer: I have to say that in this forum I can't begin to describe all of the
intracacies that I deal with here. However, 95% of the time, I'm incredibly
happy - I'm betting already with the best hand - they're raising on the come and
I know it... "RE-REAISE THIS!"
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