THE BRIAN INTERVIEW (posted 1/6/00, file01.02)
No part of this interview may be reproduced in any way. Any illegal reproduction will result in.. ouch, shit! dude stop hitting me! damn, okay I'll stop reproducing... I mean reproducing the interview.
MNP: You recently lost your coveted crown of Grand Poker Master to Jimbo after a dismal night of minus 50. What would you like to say to Jimbo
that may make him feel welcome in the new position?
Answer: Jimbo ees an imperalistic gringo bitch-dog. I spit ::patooey:: on hees grandmama. Dees is me barrio, holmes. Nobody disses me een me barrio. I cut him, I cut heem bad.
Um, okay. Next question...
MNP: Upon researching further your Slovakian background I found that you are actually part Islamic as well. What do you have to say about this?
Answer: Islamic? At least that's better than Jimbo, I hear he's black.
MNP: Finish the sentence: There was one night that I was playing poker with the guys and I thought...
Answer: . . . maybe, just maybe, no one would notice if I sucker punched Doug. Then I'd look at Doug with this amazed look and point at Russ. <-- happens 2-3 times a week.
MNP: If you could say anything to one of the poker regulars, who and what would it be?
Answer: To RUSS: "Yes Russ, (see Russ interview) my back hair does get ruffled. But as the global temperatures continue to rise and the further depletion of the ozone layer results in higher and higher levels of radiation, my natural olive skin tone and fur-covered body will protect me and my progeny from the Earth of tomorrow. Most of your DNA-challenged offspring will shrivel and die covered with hideous festering cancerous lesions. As a matter of fact, I sit at home all day and spray CFC-laden cans in blissfull glee into the air, knowing full well that the Slovak Gorilla Army will someday rule the planet. (By the way, the SIGNIFICANT ass hair you sport will cause your family to mutate into an unintelligent species of large hairy assses that we will kick around and generally make fun of in our spare time)."
MNP: If you were dealing Follow the Queen and noticed that you had two
queens down, would you change the game rules to "continue the deal even
if no queens come face up" knowing that chances are slim that one may
come face up?
Answer: I don't know - I think I'd have to check with Frank, and then do the opposite.
BACK to Interviews
|
HOME | TOURNEYS | STATS | ADVERTISERS | BOTM | TERMS OF USE
|
